the witch who lived on jesus st.

I’m a slasher, fanwarrior, pansexual, writer, artist, graphic designer, witch, and above all else, eclectic & random. This is a Hate Free Zone, NSFW blog.
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newdisaster:

wsswatson:

canon holmes meeting his 21st century self and hating him because he lives in a world where he can hold and kiss and MARRY watson and he’s too afraid to follow his heart ahahahahaha kill me

THIS IS THE WORST

sam-winchester-cries-during-sex:

prokopetz:

sixsaltysweets:

thetremblingofmyhand:

escapedosmil:

noelledino:

deductionhunters:

chocolateist:

i-want-cheese:

bakaandty:

i-want-cheese:

blogorgtfo:

assbutt-in-the-garrison:

Back when I was younger and more ignorant and misinformed than I am now, one of my exes literally made me feel guilty sometimes when he got a boner and I didn’t want to “take care of him”. He claimed that it caused him a lot of pain and he said that his doctor had actually said he couldn’t leave himself in that state or else he could damage himself…. So made me feel like I HAD to give him relief even when I really did not desire to. And that sucked.

Wait… it DOESN’T hurt them?

Boys get boners all the time for no reason. No, it doesn’t hurt them. If any boy tries to tell you otherwise, run away as fast as you can because he’s lying to you for the sake of his penis.

No penis is more important than you because you are a whole person and a penis is just a spongy flab o’ flesh. 

Hahaha deff not I get boners constantly.
Math
Driving
Light
Anything causes them

Favorite answer so far.

Math.

Dicks can seriously be ridiculous at times

Hell sometimes a brisk breeze can set them off

Reblogging this for all of the girls and guys that DO NOT KNOW THIS INFORMATION.  Because this is extremely important.

HEY!!! 

HEYYYYYY!!!!

The term ‘blue balls’ isn’t actually a fucking thing. 

It was created by giant flopping douche canoes to con girls into rubbing their little dingadongs. 

I literally get 10 boners a day and never get blue balls. 

Next time someone tries to shame you into a handy, kick them in the balls and tell them “NOW YOU HAVE BLUE BALLS”

Sorry but, coming from a woman, “blue balls”  (ie pain caused by temporary fluid congestion) can be a thing, it’s just that not all men experience it, it will not cause any damage if not “treated”, and no woman should be obliged to “relieve” a guy with this problem. 

this is glorious and hilarious and informative thank you

Also, consider the following:

  1. "Blue balls" is caused by referred pain from vascular congestion of erectile tissue.
  2. Vascular congestion of erectile tissue is, in turn, caused by prolonged arousal that does not result in orgasm.
  3. This is not a gendered phenomenon; just about every configuration of genitals has erectile tissue that can become painfully congested in this fashion.
  4. In general, clitoral erectile tissue is both more nerve-rich and more internalised than penile erectile tissue (90% of the clitoral shaft lying within the body).
  5. Women are much more likely not to get off from sex than men are.

The upshot is that, if you’re a heterosexual dude, in all balance of probability you’ve “blue balled” your partner both more frequently and more severely than she’s ever done to you - and you don’t hear her complaining, do you?

Okay i’m 16 and never in my short life have I thought that men actually go through physical pain if left without relief. Reblogging to signal boost to less fortunate women

(via newdisaster)

Asker Anonymous Asks:
i got my ass ate in the men's room @ olive garden thnx for this opportunity
magic-samwitch magic-samwitch Said:

friendlycloud:

feminism5ever:

For all you gross cop apologists + people who haven’t been keeping up:

  1. Autopsy showed no sign of struggle. Also, the autopsy showed the bullet wounds on the inside of his arm which means that his arms had to be up.
  2. The picture of the CT scan that’s being passed around to show that Wilson had an orbital blowout fracture is actually from 2008 from the University of Iowa.
  3. Video shows Brown paying at the store.
  4. The only eyewitness who supported the police’s story is fake.
  5. Actual eyewitness accounts of what happened.

Yeah. There was absolutely no reason to kill Michael Brown. What happened was murder, plain and simple.

This is the post we all need.

(via newdisaster)

kismesister:

friendlytroll:

mamasam:

stopthatimp:

nani was NINETEEN and such a fucking badass who was so protective of lilo and just ROLLED with aliens being a thing towards the end of the movie. #1 Disney relative of all time.

I have honestly been waiting AGES for the right gifset to express the wonderful perfection that is Nani. She is not only protective of Lilo, she respects the way Lilo’s imagination and quirkiness works.

Pudge the fish got a peanut butter sandwich every Thursday. Nani does not argue the logic of feeding him, only suggests an alternative sandwich when they are out of peanut butter. Lilo was allowed to take as many photos of whatever mundane or odd subjects as she wanted and Nani would get them developed. Nani recognized what were important habits for Lilo.

When Lilo asks for a pet lobster, Nani does not tell her that lobsters are not pets. She tells her, “We don’t have a lobster door, we have a dog door.” She makes sure the woman at the pound does not tell Lilo that “Stitch is not a real name”.

NANI SPENDS THE ENTIRE MOVIE MAKING SURE THAT LILO NEVER FEELS LIKE HER IDEAS ARE WRONG.

The only time we truly see Nani get angry with Lilo is when she is scared of Lilo being taken away. Nani spends the entire movie stressed out over taking care of her sister, trying to find a job, trying to make sure her sister has a friend, and yet she is always willing to put that extra effort, over and over again, to make sure that Lilo always believes that anything is possible.

This is a great moment because she probably *remembered* that Lilo said this once. And you know what? Shes not ending this day by letting her little sister think this is her fault. She’s not having an easy time trying to be a parent, but she knows none of this is her sisters fault, and shes not going to let her think it is. 

And half of her terror of losing Lilo isnt even just losing her family; its knowing that wherever Lilo goes, they won’t know how to do these things. They won’t understand her. 

What a good movie. 

Casual reminder that the reason Lilo obsessively feeds the fish is because her parents died in a rainstorm and she firmly believes Pudge controls the weather. If you pay attention to the feeding sequence you will notice that storm clouds recede and dissipate, a visual narrative that confirms this.

It’s not just a habit. It’s a very real part of Lilo’s healing process and Nani understands that.

Also if you pay attention to Nani’s room you’ll notice she had surfing posters and trophies. She was very much on her way to being a pro surfer but had to give it up to become the adult Lilo needed her to be.

And not ONCE does Nani show her sister any resentment. It’s worth it to keep her family together. This is a young woman who is willing to sacrifice all of her dreams and make incredibly grown up decisions.

What I am saying is Nani is the best disney princess of all time. Disney Queen even.

(via newdisaster)

Why do white people own so many pets?
Because we’re not allowed to own people anymore.
*****
What is the scariest thing about a white person in prison?
You know he did it.
*****
how many Chicago cops does it take to change a light bulb? None, they just beat the room for being black.”
*****
A good looking 50 year old white man is trying to get laid on reality TV. What show are you watching?
To catch a predator.
*****
Why do white girls travel in groups of three or five?
They can’t even
*****
What do you call 64 white people in a room? A full blooded Cherokee.

from various reddit threads

at dinner last night, a coworker was talking about hanging out with his white friends and getting fed up with the racist jokes, and asked them to tell a white people joke.  nobody had any, so he googled and found these. after a few of them, people were a lot less comfortable.

white folks, next time you hear a racist joke, maybe lead with one of these in response.  tag this “I’m white” when you reblog it, if you are.

(via cuterpillar)

(via newdisaster)

newdisaster:

areyoutryingtodeduceme:

tzikeh:

helila:

best goddamn cover I’ve heard so far

Fuck goddamn I love this so much I just want to have been the person who came up with the idea I LOVE IT JESUS FUCK COVERS OF MUSIC THAT GO IN OTHER DIRECTIONS ARE THE WHOLE REASON TO GET UP IN THE MORNING

PLEASE WATCH THIS

THIS IS THE RAZZLE DAZZLE

sierracuse:

sizvideos:

Video

Literally took my breath away.

(via newdisaster)

Sherlock + flirting with men

(via valeria2067)

shamelesslyunladylike:

lesradicalfeminisms:

tumbling-torterra:

a-strawbarry:

houseofheavy:

etspiritusvitae:

the female body is hardcore as fuck. 

Yes is it.

so is the male body
it’s sad to see so many people like this on this website


OP is praising the fact that women hold a fucking infant in their belly the size of a ribcage, get the fuck over yourself for 3.5 seconds.

*~*~follow for more fragile male ego~*~*

The male body is more susceptible to hereditary diseases because of their lack of a second X chromosome. Their testosterone production ages them faster and causes them to die sooner. Their center of gravity is higher because of their tiny little hips and overgrown shoulders, making them easier to topple. Their gonads are placed outside of the body, in a very vulnerable position, because they do not function properly if they get a little bit warmer than usual. They have non-functional nipples, but still enough breast tissue to get cancer.The male body is not hardcore. The male body is to the female body what a shoddy, unstable mod is to a well-estabilished piece of software. Sit the fuck down. And try to not crush your fragile pathetic outside gonads when you do it.

shamelesslyunladylike:

lesradicalfeminisms:

tumbling-torterra:

a-strawbarry:

houseofheavy:

etspiritusvitae:

the female body is hardcore as fuck. 

Yes is it.

so is the male body

it’s sad to see so many people like this on this website

OP is praising the fact that women hold a fucking infant in their belly the size of a ribcage, get the fuck over yourself for 3.5 seconds.

*~*~follow for more fragile male ego~*~*

The male body is more susceptible to hereditary diseases because of their lack of a second X chromosome. Their testosterone production ages them faster and causes them to die sooner. Their center of gravity is higher because of their tiny little hips and overgrown shoulders, making them easier to topple. Their gonads are placed outside of the body, in a very vulnerable position, because they do not function properly if they get a little bit warmer than usual. They have non-functional nipples, but still enough breast tissue to get cancer.

The male body is not hardcore. The male body is to the female body what a shoddy, unstable mod is to a well-estabilished piece of software. Sit the fuck down. And try to not crush your fragile pathetic outside gonads when you do it.

(via punctured-hearts)

theparadoxmachine:

Some of my neighbors moved out today and left behind a bunch of plant and these two little turtles. My other neighbors took the turtles but can’t keep them. They were going to release them at a pond because none of the pet stores will take them, but you might as well just put them in a crock pot with some carrots and chicken stock, because releasing them into the wild will probably kill them. I took them for now, but I can’t keep them either. I have no room and I know fuck all about caring for turtles.

I don’t know what to do. Today’s been hell, my life is uncertain, my bank is trying to screw me, and now I have turtles I can’t care for. But I can’t just let them go. The only thing I can think to do is try to find them a home.

rainygalaxy18:

nothisisc8:

YOU KIDS THESE DAYS AND YER FANCY “SPRINTING” AND “MOTION CONTROLS”

WHEN I WAS YOUR AGE WE COULDN’T MAKE LINK RUN FASTER

NO, WE HAD TO ROLL ACROSS HYRULE FIELD TO MAKE IT TO KAKARIKO BY NIGHTFALL

BAREFOOT, IN THE SNOW, TAPPING THE A BUTTON REPEATEDLY FOR 10 MILES

AND WE WERE GRATEFUL

(via punctured-hearts)

-annoying:

the “i’m not afraid to verbally assault a middle schooler if they look at my kid the wrong way” haircut

image

(via punctured-hearts)

jcatgrl:

copperbadge:

persinetteinthetower:

moriartythetease:

So what happens if two people who have promised their firstborn to separate witches have a child together? Do they both just pop up in the nursery and have a custody battle?

I need a book about a little girl whose parents had promised their firstborn to different witches and the only way that both ends of the deal were fulfilled was for them to have joint custody of the child.

I love it!

And then the witches, forced to share a cottage while raising their joint stolen child, fall in love…

(via newdisaster)